31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Introversion

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Day 11: Introversion

I make it no secret that I identify as an introvert. This hasn’t always been the case, but it has somewhat to do with what I thought an introvert is. I used to think that an introvert is someone shy, incredibly awkward and unable to talk to people. So I might have the awkward thing down, but I am not shy, and I love talking to people. Most all of the jobs that I’ve ever had has been a customer service-oriented job, and I love helping people! So with that definition and the kind of person I am, it’s no wonder that I didn’t realize that I am an introvert.

So what is an introvert? The best description that I have seen of it is through a comic drawn by artist SVeidt on DeviantArt. (Click on the comic to be taken to the original drawing where you can zoom to see it better.)

The part that I identify with the most is that I am re-energized by spending time alone, and it drains me to be around people for long periods of time. It doesn’t mean that I don’t like spending time with people, though I do prefer spending time with only one or a few people at a time. I usually spend my alone time reading, watching tv or surfing the internet. When I am out of the house and on-the-go too much, I long to be at home to re-gain my energy. When I don’t have sufficient time to get that energy back, I tend to withdraw and become cranky.

I still love to spend time with my friends, and in the past year my husband and I have started hanging out with other introvert friends. It started with a couple of dinner plans and was nicknamed The Introvert Supper Club. Now the group gets together, usually at our house, once every month or two for birthdays, food and game nights. A few of us are taking a water aerobics class together, too. The cool thing about it is that we all understand the need for alone time and don’t usually hound anyone who can’t make it because there’s too much already going on.

Out of my immediate family, my mom is the only one of us who is extroverted. She loves being out and about with things to do, people to see and places to go. My Dad and brother are both introverts, too, and prefer to stay at home most of the time. I totally didn’t see this growing up but can definitely pinpoint times where it was pure torture for her to drag us out of the house sometimes. Unfortunately she still doesn’t get it and tends to think she’s introverted, only because she has a messed up idea of what it is. I have hope one day that she’ll understand that it’s not usually the event or her or something more than just needing some alone time that keeps us from wanting to get out.

I wrote briefly about Being Inside My Introvert Bubble a couple of weeks ago. It’s also got some good pointers on How To Care For Introverts.

Do you identify more with introversion or extroversion? Is there someone in your life who identifies with the other? How do you deal with the difference? 

“Introverts treasure the close relationships they have stretched so much to make.” ― Adam S. McHugh

Read more about the 31 Days of Journaling Prompts
Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days of Great Nonfiction Reads @ The Deliberate Reader

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Love

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Day 10: Love

Love is a common topic. Love is everywhere. What area of media or information doesn’t talk about love? Movies, Books, Poems, Songs, Television, and so on. We’re surrounded by the topic and hopefully most everyone is surrounded by the love of friends and family. Love is one of those things that we don’t have spend money to give, yet often times we hold it in for fear of it being taken for granted. Love can hurt when it’s not reciprocated.

One thing about love that we often forget is that to love and accept people in your life doesn’t mean that you have to agree with their actions. I’m not going to claim this reminder as something that I came up with. Pastor Pete at CrossPoint is the one who reminded me of it a couple of weeks ago with a sermon in The Reckless Ones series. This series has truly touched my heart, as well as being on topic for today’s journaling prompt. The Reckless Ones is about loving people regardless of who they are and what they do. Simply love them!

I wrote more about this a month ago when I talked about how I want to be known. I’ll say it again:
I want to be known for my love of God and my love of people, no matter who they are. I want my love to shine through and be obvious to the people that I encounter. 

I think next week is the last in the series at church, and it’s probably the one series that has touched me the most since I started attending CrossPoint back in the spring. Something else that stood out to me in this series was from last week, where in our small group, we talked about what changes when loving someone is more important than being right. I recently had an experience like this with someone on Facebook who posted something that I didn’t agree with in regards to how she perceives Christians. I’m not one to argue with people on the internet, but I fell into the trap of saying that not all Christians are like the person she described, and she proceeded to give me examples. Instead of continuing the argument, I simply told her that I love her. I’m not sure if it meant anything to her, but maybe it planted that seed.

“Three things will last forever–faith, hope, and love–and the greatest of these is love.” – I Corinthians 13:13

How do you want to be known? Can you love and accept someone without agreeing with their actions? 

Read more about the 31 Days of Journaling Prompts
Today’s recommended 31 Day Bloggers: 31 Days of Love at Dana Pittman

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Volunteer

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Day 9: Volunteer

I have a heart for volunteer work. I get a huge blessed feeling when I am able to give back by donating my time to a worthy cause. I can’t really say where it began or what exactly gave me the heart to enjoy it, but my dad would probably say that I am a bleeding heart liberal.

In college I didn’t go for the sorority thing, but I was very involved in a couple of service organizations on campus. One was the Environmental Club where we got the community started in recycling and also handed out dorm-safe plants to new freshmen. The other was Alpha Phi Omega. A Phi O uses greek letters, but they are a co-ed service fraternity not associated with the social fraternities and sororities. We were very active on campus with all sorts of community service projects and fundraisers for various things. It was perfect for me!

Once I graduated college, I had an empty space in my heart where volunteer work had been. I went a few years with that empty feeling before I was able to start finding ways to get involved again. I’ve sorted clothes to be sent to Africa at a thrift shop, helped out at the local food bank, made TONS of cookies for fundraisers where I used to work, cleaned flower beds at the county fairgrounds, and so many other activities.

The past couple of years, most of my volunteer work has been more about donating money than my time. I want to get more involved with volunteering my time again. Some day I’m going to work at the Nashville Rescue Mission and for Habitat for Humanity. They’re on my list!

Nashville has an awesome program called Hands On Nashville where volunteer projects in the area are posted for people to sign up to volunteer. If you live in Nashville, you should definitely check it out. If not, check to see if your community has something like this. I had never heard of Hands On Nashville until the May 2010 Flood in Nashville. I’m pretty sure that Hands On Nashville played a huge part in the Nashville community coming together during that time to get our city back in order.

The absolute best volunteer work I’ve been part of is the one where I don’t even feel like I am a volunteer. I am a Big Sister! My Little Sister and I were matched in 2009 when she was just 6 years old. She’s now 10 and has grown into a beautiful and smart young lady. I love spending time with her and being there while she grows and experiences new things. I want to go ahead and tell you all about her, but I’m saving that writing for the Journaling Prompt for Mentor on Sunday. If you’ve ever thought about being a Big Brother or Big Sister, then be sure to come back yo my blog on Sunday! It’s high on the list of  the most rewarding experiences I’ve ever had in my life.

Read more about the 31 Days of Journaling Prompts
Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days To Give @ Heather Bixler

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Family

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Day 8: Family

Through ups and downs, my family hangs in there. We’ve all had our share of problems that sometimes affected the whole family, but we keep it together and keep going. I am very close to my immediate family and still rely on them to be there for me when I need it.

My parents have been married for 41 years now. They have a very combative but mostly honest relationship where they just tell it like it is. I remember when I was young I felt like they argued more than they should and that they were always on the verge of divorce. It took me several years to learn that that’s just how they communicate, and that they were never going to be like television families that I thought were the norm. Now I realize that television families were never the norm, and it seems silly to have ever compared them that way. Maybe it’s a child of the 70’s/80’s thing where families were portrayed as having problems that were somehow always resolved within 30 minutes. I think it warped my expectations. Now I realize that my parents get along like most normal married couples who aren’t in a sitcom. My dad retired at the end of last year and is LOVING it! My mom is most likely going to retire sometime this year. If they don’t kill each other within a year of my mom’s retirement, then I think they’ll stay together forever.

I was an only child for almost 8 years before my brother was born. With the age gap, I ended up being like another parental figure for him, especially after I turned 12 and he was my responsibility during the summer. The summer after I turned 16, Matthew went with me EVERYWHERE. I think it was my mom’s way of making sure that I didn’t get into trouble, not that I was a bad kid, but she knew that I would never do anything bad with him around. It was most likely also a way for my parents to get us both out of the house. That was 19 years ago now, and I don’t ever really recall him being a burden. He always behaved much better for me than he did for my mom. I think kids are just like that, though. My brother will be 28 next month and is quite a handsome guy. I love him dearly and feel so lucky to have him as my only sibling.

I am also blessed with some pretty awesome extended family through aunts, uncles and David’s side of the family. There’s also a few other people in my life that I’m not related to by blood or marriage that I consider my family. However, I’m going to keep this entry short, sweet and just about my immediate family. They’re fabulous enough on their own.

“The love of family and the admiration of friends is much more important than wealth and privilege.” – Charles Kuralt 

What makes your family unique? 

 

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Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Letters To My Mother @ Leanne Penny

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Green

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Day 7: Green

I do my best to do my part in being Green.

  • I carry reusable bags to the grocery store.
  • I stopped buying bottled water to take to work and now fill 3 reusable containers with water from home to put in my lunch box.
  • I recycle everything that my city will recycle.
  • I’m trying to buy more local produce when I can.
  • I’m doing a little more shopping in second hand stores for clothing.
  • I donate items to the Goodwill instead of throwing them away if someone else can get use of the item.
  • I try to put all of my lunch items in reusable containers or bags that I will reuse again.
  • I use the backs of work printouts for scratch paper (and try not to print if I can help it).

I still feel like there’s so much more that I could do. When I look around my house and see all of the disposable containers that my food comes in or that I store my leftovers in (even though I reuse them) or the paper from junk mail and so on, I can’t help but wonder if there is more that I can do. I honestly think it’s to the point that our society couldn’t truly function without all the waste, but I also feel that we can’t continue to waste as much as we do. It’s a Catch 22, and I feel like I’m at a loss as to what more I can do.

One thing that bugs me is that when I make a purchase somewhere, and bring my reusable bags or tell the cashier that I don’t need a bag, I get strange looks or they put it in a bag, anyway. I’m always left baffled by this. One time a very distracted cashier bagged up our groceries in plastic bags, despite the reusable bags being right in front of her. David and I re-bagged everything on the sidewalk of the grocery store so that we could go ahead and put the plastic bags in the recycling bin instead of carrying them home just to bring them back the next week for recycling. Oh, and they like to offer to put our produce and meat in plastic bags, too. Ugh! I KNOW other people are using the reusable bags or carrying their items without a bag, but sometimes they make me feel like it’s an unheard of concept. Seriously, if I walked to the register carrying all of my items without a cart, then I most definitely do not need a bag for it.

So I don’t really feel like I got anywhere with this topic, other than trying to make myself more aware of opportunities that I might have to reduce, reuse and recycle. It’s a start! This problem is definitely one of those complex problems that cannot be solved with simple solutions.

What do you do to reduce, reuse and recycle? 

“We are living on this planet as if we had another one to go to.” – Terri Sweringen

Read more about the 31 Days of Journaling Prompts
Today’s recommended 31 Day Bloggers: 31 Days To Reducing Your Carbon Footprint @ Perfectly Flawed Woman

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Vacation

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Day 6: Vacation

Do we ever get enough of vacationing? Okay, maybe we do. You know that last day or the last few hours before your plane departs? Or maybe it’s not until you’re almost home that you start to miss home and you’re ready to go back to your regularly scheduled life. The last day is usually the worst, because it seems that there’s a ton of things to cram in at the last minute or there’s a rush to pack and get going. The funny thing for me is that usually the last day of vacation is the worst day for weather for me. It’s like God is taking off my rose-colored glasses and reminding me that even the best vacation spots don’t have perfect weather all the time. Too hot, too cold, rain, and so on.

This year I have been blessed with a few vacations and still 2 more planned for this year.

In February, David and I got married in Savannah, Georgia, so we made a week out of it for a vacation. Our families were there for at least half of that time, so it was good to be able to experience the beautiful city with them while they were there for our wedding. We had a list of recommended restaurants to try out, and we made it to most of them. Actually, we always have Yelp bookmarks of places we’ve heard to try in various cities that we plan to visit. We also did several tourist events, like a trolley tour and a ghost tour, as well as our own walking tours through the beautiful squares and Bonaventure Cemetery. The South is known for humidity, and in Tennessee we get a fair amount of it during the summer. However, I was not prepared to be inundated by the humidity in late February. My frizzy hair definitely showed how humid the city was! On the flip side, the warm air made it possible for us to enjoy the weather outside without being cold.

In April, David had a conference in Las Vegas, and I went with him. He’s been going to this conference every year for about 10 years, and this was my fourth year to go. We have friends who live in Vegas, so there is always something for me to do during the day while he is conferencing. The best thing about Vegas is that there are TONS of non-gambling things to do, see and visit. I usually treat myself to some spa time and shopping. In the evenings David and I explore restaurants we haven’t tried and re-visit the ones we loved the most from prior years. We try to go to one event or show each year, too. This year we saw Ka at the MGM Grand, our first Cirque De Soleil show. It was amazing! Next year David’s conference is in New Orleans, and while I think it will be cool to visit a new place (somewhere I haven’t been since I was a kid), I’m going to miss visiting my Vegas friends…and In-N-Out.

For Labor Day weekend, David and I headed south to Orange Beach, Alabama for some much needed time spent on the beach. Well, the much needed part was for me, not David. He’s not a huge fan of the beach, but he indulged me this year. There’s something incredibly relaxing for me to spend some time with my sand in the toes, and the sounds of the waves coming in. Since this trip was not long after my surgery, I was afraid I would be limited in what I could eat while dining out, but luckily being that close to the ocean, there are tons of fresh seafood offered at pretty much every restaurant. Since the vacation was more for relaxing and not being on-the-go like some vacations end up being, I also took the time to exercise every day, too. I came back from that vacation 4 1/2 pounds lighter!  It was definitely enough for me to wish the vacation never ended, but on our last day we took a final walk on the beach, and it poured down rain on us for the last half mile. Blinding, unexpected rain!

Two other trips that we have planned this year is a weekend trip to Atlanta for David’s Birthday and Thanksgiving in Detroit with David’s family. I’m incredibly excited about both! I love planning out trips and can’t wait to start planning for next years vacations.

“Too much work, too much vacation, too much of any one thing is unsound.” – Walter Annenberg 

Where is your favorite vacation spot? What places did you visit this year? Do you have a funny or memorable vacation story? 

Read more about the 31 Days of Journaling Prompts
Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days of Places I Want To Take My Kids @ Small Kids, Big Adventures

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Marriage

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Day 5: Marriage

Let me just start this by saying that this post in no way is meant to be used as marriage advice. There are thousands, maybe millions of books, articles, blog posts, research…anything you can imagine out there for advice on marriage. I am certainly not an authority on the Do’s and Don’ts of marriage, so if you’re looking for that, then you won’t find it here.

I can, however, speak to my thoughts and experience on marriage. I was married for nearly 10 years previous to being married to David. I don’t talk about it too often, but I don’t exactly keep it a secret, either. I can say, without a doubt, that I don’t regret being married to my first husband, and I don’t regret our divorce, either. Like everything in life, I learned so much in my first marriage that living with regret would make those entire 12 years we were together feel like they never happened. All of the experiences that I had made me who I am today, as well as making me the wife I am to David now.

One piece of advice often given for marriage is to make sure that you communicate. It really seems like an obvious piece of advice but so often it doesn’t happen. There are so many factors involved in keeping communication open that we neglect the importance. You know, things like, ‘If I ask him to take out the trash, he’ll think I’m nagging him.’ ‘If I tell her that I don’t want to go, she’ll be upset with me.’ Seriously, I could list dozens of these.

Why do we hold back those thoughts? I know for me that there are times that I have learned to pick my battles. Sometimes it’s just not worth the energy to take the chance of causing discourse. Does that mean that I lack communication skills with my husband? No, but I do need to  be sure to express to him the ones that ARE the most important to me, otherwise it could lead to me resenting him for not caring about my feelings when he didn’t even know how important it is to me.

I recently learned that a couple we know will call a “Time Out” if they get into a heated argument and they are getting nowhere with it. They pause the argument, set a time, perhaps an hour or later in the day to reconnect and start communicating again. The time away from whatever has caused the argument cools them both down and makes them not only re-think their thoughts but also the importance of their side. I love this idea!

David and I often take our arguments to email for similar reasons. Instead of waiting for the other person to stop speaking so that we can speak our side, by taking it to email we read the other’s thoughts, process the information, then we speak our side. This might not work for everyone, but as I wrote previously, this works for us because much of our relationship has been via IM, email or text. We’re one of those couples who rarely speak on the phone unless something is wrong or we can’t text/email. Weird, huh?

So take my advice…HA! No, really! Like I said, my intention is not to give advice but instead speak from my own experiences. What works for us might not work for you, but then again maybe this will make you think about your own marriage or relationship and how you can make it work well for you.

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” – Friedrich Nietzsche 

What’s something unique about your marriage or relationship? Do you have some unconventional advice that you would like to share? What works for you?

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Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days To a Happy Marriage @ Kristen Living the Sweet Life

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Motivation

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Day 4: Motivation

Sometimes I feel like the least motivated person in the world. It’s easy to get into that rut, though, especially when what you want seems so far out of reach. My husband often reminds me that I am much more motivated than I give myself credit. He’s good like that. He’s what keeps me going some days.

Since my surgery, I have definitely been more motivated to eat healthier and kick my butt to exercise, but MAN there are days that I just don’t want to do it! When this happens, my inner two-year old is having a major meltdown temper tantrum. Luckily on the outside I am mostly under control and people don’t notice that I’m slightly crazy in the head. It’s so much easier to just not track my food and skip the exercise, but then I remind myself that behavior like that is what got me to where I needed the surgery. By the way, weight loss surgery is NOT always the answer and it is definitely not the easy way out. I still have to work at it to lose the weight, and it’s not just magically falling off over night.

I have been overweight all of my life or at least as far as my memory goes. I don’t know what it’s like being a normal-sized person. You would think that is reason enough to motivate me, but it’s also what scares me. What if I can’t do it? What if I can’t make it to that point? What if I do make it then slowly get back into old habits? When thoughts like this pop into my head, it just makes me want to take the easy way out and give up. I don’t want to work so hard for nothing.

But it IS something, and I HAVE to keep going! Lately what motivates me the most is that I have stopped concentrating on how far I have to go and started looking at how far I’ve come. I am one-fourth of the way to reaching my weight loss goal. When I look at it that way, I realize that it’s something in which to be proud. I am going to keep going!

“You have a masterpiece inside you, too, you know. One unlike any that has ever been created, or ever will be. And remember: If you go to your grave without painting your masterpiece, it will not get painted. No one else can paint it. Only you.” — Gordon MacKenzie

What motivates you? Does it take a little or a lot to get you going? 

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Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days To Write Your Story @ Lisa-Jo Baker

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Habit

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Day 3: Habit

How many can identify with being a creature of habit? I think most everyone is to some extent. We find comfort in repetition and knowing that what we do will generate the same results. Or maybe that’s just me.

My husband has the same pancakes for breakfast and the same sandwich for lunch every day during the week. I’ve been known to do this for several weeks or months at a time, too, then suddenly one day I want something different. I like that my husband is predictable in that way. It certainly makes it easier for me to plan meals when I know what he likes and doesn’t like. We do our grocery shopping together, but if I ever had to do it on my own, then I would know exactly what to get for him.

But what happens when that ritual is broken for some reason? Do we get bent out of shape? Can we handle the change?

The sandwich that my husband used to buy for lunch suddenly started dwindling from the freezer section of the grocery store. He talked to the grocery manager, and they said they weren’t ordering it any more. Something similar had happened to him once before with some chicken pot pies that he liked for dinner when he was still single, but he found out that the company stopped making them. This time, however, the store just stopped ordering it, but oddly enough they told him that they would go to the competitor store and buy theirs to sell to him. Seriously? It was a little (no, a lot) weird that they would offer that, so we declined. He was somewhat bent out of shape when this first happened, but he ended up finding another sandwich to start taking for his lunch. Let’s hope they don’t stop making this one!

Good habits to get into are making schedules so that you’re never at a loss of where you’re supposed to be or what you’re supposed to be doing. I’ve been using Google Calendar since 2006, and it has saved me many times from missing out on something that I likely would forget. Making commitments to exercising on specific days has helped me, though I’m still working on it. I find that the less I dwell on making decisions and just doing things automatically, the better off I am at keeping with those good habits. If I know that every Thursday I am going to go to water aerobics, it makes it easier for me to not make other plans on Thursday evenings. I simply work better on a schedule and get more accomplished.

“The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.” – Samuel Johnson 

Are you more of a scheduled person or someone spontaneous? What habits have you formed that have been good for you? Do you have any bad habits that you need to change?

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Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days of Good Books @ The Pentriloquist

31 Days of Journaling Prompts: Balance

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Day 2: Balance

Ah, balance. I’m not sure how balance ended up being the second on my list of journaling prompts. Perhaps it’s because my subconscious knew that I need to work on finding balance in my life. Lately I’ve not been content with some things in my life. It’s not that I’m unhappy but more along the lines of feeling like I need to get myself together. I’ve been reading and studying the Bible more lately, and I can honestly say that I feel like it is helping!  I’m finding God speaking to me through the words that I read and comforting me in the areas where I am not feeling content. It’s amazing how the answers seem to come when you’re open and ready to hear them.

Another balance that I’ve been working on is balancing my eating and exercising. As a compulsive overeater, I often turn to food for comfort. While weight loss surgery has helped this some, I will most likely always have this addiction. I find that if I recognize the problem that I am experiencing, I can sometimes find an alternative way of dealing with it that does not involve food. Journaling in my handwritten journal seems to be the best way to deal with it, but I don’t always turn to it. I’ve also found that keeping busy in the evenings will usually keep me from snacking. Watching tv and reading in bed is usually the worst time for me in regards to snacking, and those are two of my favorite things to do in the evening! When I exercise in the evening it usually helps curb my appetite, too. It’s win-win when I don’t find excuses not to exercise.

Balancing everything in life is a constant struggle that we all have to deal with. My tendency to take on too much at one time usually stems from boredom, and I overcompensate by looking for things to do and finding too much. Before I know it, I feel so overwhelmed that I can’t keep it all going, and I end up dropping everything. What comes next? Boredom…and the cycle begins again. I’m usually way into it before I realize that the cycle has restarted. Surely I’m not the only one who experiences this. We have to learn to prioritize our opportunities and learn to say, ‘No’ to the ones that don’t make the top of the list.

“Everyone spends their lives trying to balance their world between good and evil.” – Laurell K. Hamilton 

What do you do to keep in balance? Has there been a time in your life that you’ve taken on too much and just can’t keep going? 

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Today’s recommended 31 Day Blogger: 31 Days To A Healthier Life @ Eclectic What Not